Anyone who knows me well will understand that I have a heartfelt passion for Gilmore Girls. I'm not good at binge-watching TV and can really only watch two episodes in a row, and I don't like unhappy endings, so I prefer not to start a television series unless it's been vetted as a great show the entire way through.
Which is why I waited so long to watch this show.
Now, I move at a snail's pace when I watch TV, so I'm only on season 6. (Side note: Gilmore Girls is filming the revival up in Burbank right now, and they wrap filming at the end of the month and it is MY DREAM to be on that show in some capacity--as Lane's daughter ((spoilers, I know!)), a townsperson, even a dancing tomato ((if they ever need one)). If you'd have asked me a few years ago if I'd even be this geographically close to Hollywood and all of its magic, I would have freaked. So if you know anyone who could make my dream come true, hmu.) And I believe this is when the show started to drag a little bit, and my friends were probably tired of me venting my frustrations at the events of the show and the estrangement between Lorelai and Rory (Are they seriously dedicating an entire episode to fighting the "Sores and Boils Avenue" name that Taylor Dosey decided for the Dragonfly??!?!?!?!?!?!) I was beginning to lose interest in the show, and I was sad that such a fantastic team had to be separated. I'm odd in the way that what I watch and what I do in my daily life impacts how I feel, so I had unknowingly started carrying this little ball of sad in my heart because my favourite TV team was fighting. This sad little ball started to build, and I became a human-sized ball of sad.
This may not make sense to some, but I was so affected because I love Rory and Lorelai. They are my favourite television duo, and I've loved watching Rory grow into a spectacularly smart young woman, and try, as much as possible, to live with her ideals and morals. Lorelai is who I someday hope to become: witty, exuberant, a star who brings life to any room she walks in. It used to be rare to find a leading lady in TV, and even now, it's rare to find such a special relationship between a mother and a daughter.
I'd like to think that my mom and I have a similar relationship. She is one of the strongest ladies I know, and has mastered the art of being both graceful and ambitious (all at the same time!). My parents moved to Canada when I was just a year old, and moving to a new country with two kids while still learning English must have been one of the most difficult things they have had to do. And she still found the time between working and moving to be a mom. We would literally do everything together. We used to wear matching t-shirts. It was so cool! I look up to my mother so much and I admire her for being such a self-starter. Whenever I don't know what to do, she always has an answer. She knows me better than anyone on this planet, and I mean it when I say that I hope to be half as great a person as she is. I am so profoundly grateful for her guiding me, caring for me, and above all, for her courage. Especially for the moments when I needed a kick in the butt to get myself started, she cared enough to be, for a moment, the person I disliked the most, so I could finally get motivated. I can't imagine what that must be like as a mother, and I am in constant awe of this courage and humility.
So, after a whole season of Rory and Lorelai fighting, being bitter, and ignoring each other, my human sized ball of sad was just about ready to explode. I wasn't expecting to have such an emotional response; all I know is that one second I was watching Lorelai try unsuccessfully to get Paul Anka to play fetch, and the next I was laughing and crying because Lorelai's face when Rory says she's going back to Yale says volumes about how proud she is of her kid. And through all the doubt, the hurt, and the boatload of failure, Rory came home. On her own. She decided to get her life on track, because that's who she is, and who her mother knows her to be. She is Rory Gilmore, daughter of Lorelai Gilmore, and they are quintessentially, the Gilmore Girls.
And that human-sized ball of sad is now a human-sized ball of happy.
And finally, a note to my mom:
Thank you for celebrating my accomplishments with me and cheering me on through my good days, but more than anything, thank you for being with me through the bad ones. For every mistake I've made, every dumb thing I've said, every horrible temper tantrum, you have always been there to support me. From the time I kept you up all night because I was scared to go on my first swim meet to the day I got into USC, to the time I tore my ACL freshman year and you flew all the way out to Los Angeles to help me, even though you had bronchitis, to just a few weeks ago when I called you, doubting all of my life decisions, you have been there for all of my bad moments and you have never given up on me. Not once.
Thank you. I can only hope that one day I'll make you as proud as Lorelai was of Rory, because I am certain I would not be where I am without you. I love you.